Walk the talk

"Silence is golden and speech is silver." It is true depending on the situations but talking enhances bonding. Most of my friends are my friends because we have chatted a lot. We have shared dreams, overcome our failures and celebrated successes. In all relationships, I do seek friendship and the only way I have known to attain it is by talking. Anyone of the relationships where talking is less, I do maintain them but with very less trace of friendship. Talking has helped me regain friendships which have been covered by the silence that gets embedded in friendship because of distance and time.

As a small girl, I was pretty quiet and shy to outsiders. This helped me to gain appreciation of being a nice girl from neighbors and acquaintances, much to the annoyance to my brother. I would go home and end up eating his and my mom's head by narrating them all the day's incidents and my opinion on various matters. But I still remained calm and introvert to others. This lasted for only few years. As I grew up I became more extrovert and talkative. You don't need to imagine my college days. I used to shudder when my dad opened the telephone bill.

I have always wondered how guys, who are more on quieter side, maintain friendships. I am sometimes puzzled how can a person talk so less. Do they not feel like expressing an opinion on a matter or argue just for the sake of argument? Maybe they are more evolved and don’t believe in these trivial matters. Maybe they seek something else. After all silence is also a language. But I also believe that everyone opens up in the right company.

What I admire in a person is not how much they talk but how well they talk. Some are able to talk precise and to the point while others just blabber to glory. In fact this reveals a strong personality trait. People who convey in fewer words are more confident of themselves whether they have accomplished the task or not. The ones who keep talking about the same thing or convey the message in more words and time seem to be justifying themselves more that others on how the task was accomplished.

Having good conversation skills definitely enhances one’s chances of climbing a corporate ladder. But this fact seems to be de-emphasized in today’s world, especially in software industry. All it seems to care is whether a problem was solved or issue was fixed but the process of getting there is not talked about.

Toastmasters is a good club to join if you are interested in improving oratory skills. It not only teaches one how to talk effectively in public but also helps in organizing thoughts and conveying them well. Till recently, I was not aware that CEOs and their board have public speakers visiting them regularly to encourage and boost their confidence. After all, success starts at few encouraging words.